It’s one thing to live on stolen land, constantly looking over your shoulder to see if anybody noticed and might decide to do something about it. It’s quite another to insist that “No one is illegal on stolen land” in front of 14.4 million viewers on live television, and have that clip played countless times for countless millions more all over YouTube and social media — all while living in a mansion that, well, sits on “stolen land.”
Billie Eilish did the latter on Sunday, and now one Los Angeles attorney plans to do something about it.
But I haven’t even told you the best part: Avi Sinai specializes in difficult evictions.
Just roll me over and throw some dirt on top of me because I’m dead of laughter.
“If you are facing a contested or high-risk eviction,” Sinai’s website boasts, “Sinai Law Firm provides strategic, trial-ready representation grounded in real courtroom experience.”
Sinai also claims he runs “the premier eviction firm in the county.”
One happy client named Alessandra T gushes on the website, “Avi was an absolute game-changer in our eviction case in Santa Monica… he not only secured a judgment for the amount owed, but also successfully removed the tenant.” And Paula B. wrote that he “was able to turn very difficult tenant situation that appeared very bleak into the best possible outcome.”
If you’ve ever heard any horror stories about how difficult it can be to secure an eviction in Democrat-run locales, you get some idea of what a fierce attorney Sinai must be.
All that is why, when Avi says he’ll represent the indigenous Tongva people pro bono, should they decide to try to reclaim the stolen land where Eilish’s $2.3 million Glendale mansion sits, you’ve got to sit up and pay attention.
Or fall down laughing. Results vary by individual.
Anyway, here’s his official announcement, made, of course, on X:
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Sinai Law Firm is offering to evict Billie Eilish from her Los Angeles home on a pro bono basis on behalf of the Tongva Tribe.
Sinai Law Firm is the premier eviction firm in the county.
— Real Estate Lawyer (@SinaiLawFirm) February 4, 2026
When asked by another X user whether Eilish was actually a squatter — which is just one of several legitimate reasons for a legal eviction — Sinai replied, “She is squatting on STOLEN LAND.”
Worse, she boasted of it on national TV. Wouldn’t you just love to see that video introduced into evidence while a family of hurt-looking Tongva people wisely nod along in the courtroom gallery? It would take a heart of stone not to laugh, and I’m happy to report I don’t have one of those, apparently.
Sinai went on to add, “Eilish’s admission that she lives on stolen land gives the tribe a rightful action for possession as the true owner of the property,” and that his firm has a 30-day eviction notice fully prepared and ready to serve — talk about a pro, right? All he needs is a Tongva victim of European settler-colonialism to make the claim, and he’ll file the paperwork, pronto.
So imagine you’re one of the remaining 3,900 or so Tongva people native to the Los Angeles basin and Southern Channel Islands, who had everything stolen from them by nasty white people just like Billie Eilish, including their language.
Justice must be served, I say!
P.S. On the off chance that you are part of the Tongva people or know one, here’s a link to Sinai Law Firm’s webpage where he offers “same-day service,” just by calling 310-967-7772.
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